Limbo

I have never been good at the Limbo. My body just doesn't bend like that. But for the past month my Life has been doing the Limbo and I hate it. I am tired of feeling so unstable. What I want is out there - it has been said and it's floating around the universe and I won't take it back because it's what I want. But I can't keep living in this Limbo state either. It's really starting to take a toll on me both mentally and physically. I never asked for any of this. I know I didn't do anything wrong but I feel like a complete failure. And I don't know how to change that. And it seems the longer this Limbo keeps going the more and more I feel like a failure. At what point do I say no more, this is it; either be in it or not. But I am scared that if I say that too soon I will have messed up my family even more. I am scared that if I speak up I will just push away what I want forever. So in this Limbo life I am going to keep trying to hold it all together, but I don't think I can last much longer.